I hope everyone is enjoying moments of peace during the holidays. They are always a bit stressful for me. And to a large extent it has to do with a desire to nurture everyone. Buy all the right gifts, send money to everyone in need and cook incredible meals.
However, this time of year, I am also reminded that this is an impossible task! I will get grumpy if I don’t at some point stop and take a deep breath! Our world needs mothers, yes! I get that. I try that. But we also need spirituality. We need to drop our doing and just enjoy the magic of being alive. This is where we find love and connection.
Finally I am humbled by the knowledge that I am not the creator. Even though I play one in this life time. Ha! And even though at times, I feel the spirit move through me, I know that I play a very small role in this incredible universe.
"The moon and the stars are not above us, the earth is on the other side of our feet."
This one is about geologic time and its relationship to the present moment. How if we look at today’s slice of the rocks we can start to untangle the mess and figure out what pieces were broken down, which ones were pulverized, melted or washed away to the sea to become the tiny’s grains of sand. Some are sharp and some rounded.
Like two heaving ships
on two different. seas, the great nave
or Eternity nestled between, these buttocks
roll and sway, rise and fall beneath gold-flowered skirts over embroidered petticoats
in the white sure of day
I am in mourning of many endings these days.
-The end of living next door to my grandkids who moved to NYC.
-The passing of my 90 year old mother-in-law who spent the last 18 months sequestered away due to virus fear while also living with severe dementia.
-Life before COVID.
-My aging cat who need more and more care by the day.
-Not Normal destructive weather.
-Loss of my extraordinary art studio in Tacoma and the life that came with it.
The prescription is to tone down the news. And to rest in my new less glorious studio where I can allow all feelings to return to me. For now black and white intuitive collage is the medium. I know it isn't great art, but it is a real, daily invitation for my internal muse to return to my daily life.
Day one: found word of the day "be a kid." Reflects a desire to see the world with fresh eyes.
I just got off the plane from my visit to Erica’s for 4 days during which time while sleeping in Erica’s office I came across several unsharpened pencils. Which is some thing you would never see in my office. I love to sharpen pencils as a way to procrastinate. SO before I set out to sharpen Erica’s with her ancient sharpener, the darling yellows sticks beckoned to me. Surely there were not always so dull and worn. They must all have history as one even came from China!
These pencils were not even in Erica’s closet, they sat on her desk waiting to be set to good use. Of course she will probably mostly work on her computer. But I do hope for their sake that they get some use.
Before I set to sharpening they spoke.
With Colette and Eamon now on the east coast, I am finding some time on my hands. So I've challenged myself to drawing what's in my backyard for a month.
Today I found some strawberries
En Franćais
La plupart des après-midi, Deb, ma consciencieuse professeure particulière de langues, est assise devant son écran d’ordinateur, m’écoutant d’une oreille et d’un œil attentif alors que j’essaye d’articuler quelques mots de français. Son chat sommeille non loin de là, profitant du soleil de la fin d’après-midi par la fenêtre. Au coucher du soleil, les derniers rayons de lumière viennent caresser le visage et les lunettes de Deb et se réfléchissent sur le mur. Ses montures dorées agissent comme un prisme, créant un véritable laser arc-en-ciel. Le chat se réveille soudainement, comme si son horloge interne lui rappelait qu’il était l’heure de sa chasse de fin de journée. Et c’est là que commence la poursuite ! L’agitation soudaine distrait et amuse Deb. Pendant quelques instants, elle est incapable de maintenir son air concentré, celui qui ne trahit jamais d’impatience à m’entendre massacrer la conjugaison d’un verbe irrégulier pour la centième fois. En fait, elle se demande tout à coup nerveusement si je ne vais pas prendre son bref manque d’attention personnellement, et décide alors de me faire savoir que son chat est à l’origine du grabuge. Cela nous fait bien rire, et je rencontre officiellement l’adorable chat tigré roux et blanc, nommé Miyoo.
In English
Most afternoons, Deb, my conscientious language tutor, sits in front of the computer screen listening with an eager face as I try to utter something intelligible in French. Her cat dozes nearby,enjoying the late sun as it streams into the window. Around dusk, the last rays of light reflect on the wall and cascade onto Deb’s bespectacled face. Her plexiglass eyeglass frame acts momentarily as a prism, creating a laser rainbow. The cat is suddenly awake, as if her body clock reminded her it is time for her late day hunt. And so the chase begins!
The sudden commotion both distracts and amuses Deb. For a moment, she is unable to maintain her look of concentration, the one that betrays no impatience at hearing me mangle the conjugation of an irregular verb for the hundredth time. In fact, she is suddenly afraid that I will take her brief discombobulation personally, so just decides to acknowledge that her cat has disrupted the classroom yet again. We have a good laugh, and I officially meets the adorable orange and white tabby named
The sudden commotion both distracts and amuses Deb. For a moment, she is unable to maintain her look of concentration, the one that betrays no impatience at hearing me mangle the conjugation of an irregular verb for the hundredth time. In fact, she is suddenly afraid that I will take her brief discombobulation personally, so just decides to acknowledge that her cat has disrupted the classroom yet again. We have a good laugh, and I officially meets the adorable orange and white tabby named Miyoo
